Due to the damage the typhoon caused, I was unable to visit Shanghai even though my friends enjoyed their time in Shanghai in 2018. During their stay, we talked through the conference application, suggesting that this gathering in Shanghai should be our annual meeting as long as our friend lived there. That's a good idea, I thought.
Then the next autum came. I planned to visit Shanghai once again, calling for other friends participation. What surprised me was that three of them, who had visited there the year before and had proposed a regular meetup, rejected my suggestion. What they said and what they would do are completely different, I felt sadly. However, I didn't care because my visit would be the first and other member would be the second.
It was September in 2018 that the typhoon hit directly, making the airport unfunctional, so I decided to leave Japan in October 2019, wishing a typhoon would not hamper my flight. What was worst, the typhoon hit directly Kansai International Airpot again, and my flight to Shanghai was cancelled in two years in a row.
I made up going there early next year, but the unexpected announcement was made that my friend in Shangai would go back to Japan by the end of that year!! Are you kidding? There is no ifs in history, but even if my friend had not come back to Japan that year, I could not have visited Shanghai. Why? The COVID-19 pandemic broke out early in 2020 and China seemed to be the epicenter of the virus.
That's why Shaghai is so far away for me, which I bet you would know how unlucky I was.
(22min, 1567words)
＜日本語訳＞by Google Translation
台風の被害で、2018年は友人たちが上海で楽しい時間を過ごしていたのに、私は上海に行けませんでした。滞在中に会議の申し込みについて話し合い、友人が上海に住んでいる限り、この上海での集まりを毎年恒例の会合にしようかと提案しました。いいアイデアだと思いました。
そして次の秋が来ました。私は他の友人たちに参加を呼びかけて、もう一度上海に行く計画を立てました。驚いたことに、前年に上海を訪れ、定期的な会合を提案していた3人が私の提案を拒否しました。彼らの言うこととやることがまったく違うことに悲しく思いました。しかし、私が1回目で他のメンバーが2回目なので気にしませんでした。
台風が直撃したのは2018年9月で、空港が機能しなくなったため、台風で飛行機が止まらないことを祈りながら、2019年10月に日本を出発することにしました。さらに最悪だったのは、台風が再び関西国際空港を直撃し、上海行きのフライトが2年連続で欠航となったことです。
来年早々に上海に行くことにしたのですが、上海にいる友人がその年の暮れまでに日本に帰国するという予想外の発表がありました!! 冗談でしょう? 歴史に「もしも」はありませんが、その年に友人が日本に帰国していなかったとしても、私は上海に行くことはできなかったでしょう。なぜでしょう? 2020年の初めにCOVID-19のパンデミックが発生し、中国がウイルスの震源地のようでした。
だからこそ、私にとって上海はとても遠いのです。私がどれほど不運だったか、あなたもご存知でしょう。
＊ChatGTPによる添削
語彙と文法の間違い
-
"Due to the damage the typhoon caused," → "Due to the damage caused by the typhoon,"
- 原因を表すときは「caused by」が自然です。
-
"even though my friends enjoyed their time in Shanghai in 2018."
- 文法的には問題ありませんが、「in Shanghai」より「when they visited Shanghai」が文意をはっきりさせます。
-
"talked through the conference application," → "talked through a conference app,"
- 「conference application」よりも「conference app」（会議用アプリ）の方が一般的な表現です。
-
"suggesting that this gathering in Shanghai should be our annual meeting as long as our friend lived there." → "suggesting that we should make this gathering in Shanghai an annual event as long as our friend was living there."
- 「be our annual meeting」よりも「make this gathering an annual event」の方が適切です。
-
"calling for other friends participation." → "calling for other friends to participate."
- 「calling for」には「to」が必要です。
-
"What they said and what they would do are completely different, I felt sadly." → "I felt sad that what they said and what they did were completely different."
- 「I felt sad that...」の方が自然です。
-
"because my visit would be the first and other member would be the second." → "because my visit would be the first and another member's visit would be the second."
- 「other member」ではなく「another member's visit」が正しいです。
-
"making the airport unfunctional," → "making the airport non-operational,"
- 「unfunctional」ではなく「non-operational」または「inoperable」がより自然です。
-
"the typhoon hit directly Kansai International Airpot" → "the typhoon directly hit Kansai International Airport"
- 「hit directly Kansai International Airpot」ではなく「directly hit Kansai International Airport」が正しい語順です。
-
"in two years in a row." → "two years in a row."
- 「in」は不要です。
-
"I made up going there early next year," → "I planned to go there early next year,"
- 「made up going」ではなく「planned to go」の方が適切です。
-
"but the unexpected announcement was made that my friend in Shanghai would go back to Japan by the end of that year!!" → "but then an unexpected announcement was made that my friend in Shanghai would return to Japan by the end of that year!"
- 「was made that」よりも「was made that...would return」が自然です。
-
"There is no ifs in history," → "There are no 'ifs' in history,"
- 「ifs」は複数形にする必要があります。
-
"the COVID-19 pandemic broke out early in 2020 and China seemed to be the epicenter of the virus."
- 文法的には問題ありませんが、「seemed to be the epicenter」が不確定な印象を与えるため、ここでの状況説明には適しています。
-
"which I bet you would know how unlucky I was." → "which I bet you can tell how unlucky I was."
- 「would know」より「can tell」の方が自然です。
＊ChatGTPによる模範解答
Due to the damage caused by the typhoon, I was unable to visit Shanghai, even though my friends enjoyed their time when they visited Shanghai in 2018. During their stay, we talked through a conference app, suggesting that we should make this gathering in Shanghai an annual event as long as our friend was living there. I thought it was a great idea.
Then the next autumn came. I planned to visit Shanghai once again, calling for other friends to participate. What surprised me was that three of them, who had visited the previous year and had proposed a regular meetup, rejected my suggestion. I felt sad that what they said and what they did were completely different. However, I didn’t mind because my visit would be the first, and another member’s visit would be the second.
It was September 2018 when the typhoon directly hit, making the airport non-operational, so I decided to leave Japan in October 2019, hoping that a typhoon wouldn’t disrupt my flight. But unfortunately, the typhoon directly hit Kansai International Airport again, and my flight to Shanghai was canceled two years in a row.
I planned to go there early the next year, but then an unexpected announcement was made: my friend in Shanghai would return to Japan by the end of that year! Are you kidding? There are no "ifs" in history, but even if my friend had not returned to Japan that year, I still couldn’t have visited Shanghai. Why? The COVID-19 pandemic broke out early in 2020, and China appeared to be the epicenter of the virus.
That’s why Shanghai remains so far away for me, and I bet you can tell how unlucky I was.
＊所感
「上海と私」な一連の話はこれにて完結。ここ最近で上海に最も近づいたのは昨年のインド帰りで乗り換えた香港だな。
さあ、9月になった。この日記は適度に続けるものの、やはり面接試験に向けてギアを上げていこう。とりあえず過去問のトピックに対するスピーチ原稿を作ろうと思う。そもそもとしてアイデアが出ないことが多いし、論理展開はより一層洗練させていきたい。今度こそ合格を勝ち取らねばね。
